I am not sure there's anything that a toddler loves more than freedom to move, but I do think that socializing would be a close second. While I can't always let my little kids have free reign in the house, I do make every effort to provide a safe play spot where they can both enjoy a little freedom and be in the midst of things.

An exersaucer, for instance, lets a baby who is not yet steady on his feet hang out with older siblings (although, he might also find himself being used as a doll, as my son did in the picture above). Play yards and enclosed areas are also a great way, I've found, to allow a child some time to develop independence, because you can give him some space and let him explore toys, books, and that tissue box you acccidnetly left nearby without anyone showing him what it's "supposed" to do.

And, yes, I admit that creating a safe play space (or preferably several that you can rotate a toddler through) can offer momma a bit of breathing room. In fact, with the right mix of toys, music, and plenty of long breaks to play with you and others, you might be able to retire the Wiggles Dance Party DVD as your I-need-to-get-dinner-ready distraction.

image © Maureen Ryan

My philosophy, in general, on big parenting issues is: "Ya gotta do what works for you and your child." I do oppose methods that are neglectful or harmful. And, to be honest, I have a low threshold for anyone who avoids encouraging a child's development because it's hard (getting them to give up that bottle or stop hitting can be very, very, VERY difficult, but in the long run they need our help to move on).

Acknowledging, then, that there area a wide range of effective approaches to potty training, the best advice I can offer is that you need to investigate different methods to find the right technique for your family. I know kids who took to the potty in two weeks and others who had to drop out of preschool because they just refused to use the toilet. Try not to let anyone pressure you into starting too soon or using techniques that aren't appropriate for your family or child.

It's also important to be honest with yourself and be sure that you don't make potty training more difficult for your toddler by injecting into the situation your own feelings (including the totally understandable desire to never again touch a poopy diaper).

You need to be there to support and teach your child, but by the toddler years, you know he already has a will and opinion all his own. So be patient, work together, and, as my friend once told me during an especially exhausting day, your child should certainly be out of diapers by college.

When my daughter was about 14 months old, she came home from day care and announced, "Geegee!" Then she lined up against the wall in the hallway and motioned for my husband and I to do the same. We did. She giggled, moved to the opposite wall and waited for us to move, too. We did. She giggled. This when on for a few minutes, until, we laughingly scooped her up and headed to the dinner table.

Interestingly, when we asked her sitter the next day about the game, the sitter looked at us confused. They had never played such a game. Four years later, we still talk about "Geegee" in our house (which we continued to play every day for months). It amazed us then (and still does) that a toddler could invent a game herself. It clearly had rules: you weren't allowed to stand next to her, you had to wait until she moved first before you switched spots, and it wasn't (happily) over until she was ready for it to be over.

As one-year-olds develop social, verbal, and cognitive skills, they are capable of much more than we could have imagined just a few months ago.

Each phase of toddler development has its amazing milestones. By age two, your child's vocabulary will be exploding, and around three years of age, you'll be delighted by her silly jokes and wish for (occasional) independence.

My advice: take lots of pictures and document those amazing moments. They certainly fly by fast.

It was one of those moments when a mother feels like aliens have landed. We were walking from the playground to the pizza place. The sun was shining, kids were skipping. All of a sudden one little boy throws himself down and whines, "No like this block." That was followed by a scream and few kicks to a poor old oak tree.

Huh?

Now this could have turned into a really bad scene. Many a time, when faced with this inexplicable mood change, I've tried to find the reason only to be given a series of cries and mumbled reasons why "this" (be it a block or a story or a sneaker...) is "bad." I've also made the mistake (more times than I ever care to admit) of reacting with anger. Get off the ground. Stop crying. Do you want me to take away your Thomas Trains until you're 35?

This time, though, I had a little grace on my side. I immediately realized that maybe there was just a lot happening for the little guy today. Maybe he was overwhelmed which made him sad or scared or tired or unable to move. So we stopped. I got down to eye level with my son -- who is currently caught between the toddler and the preschool years when everything, except his baby brother, is bigger than him and he never gets to control anything around him.

"I think it's time for a piggy back pokey," I told him, referring to the silly routine we did on the way to drop off the first few weeks he started nursery school.

I got a half smile. Then he climbed on my back and we started up the block again, singing at the top of our lungs the Hokey Pokey, throwing our hands out and turning around in circles. My 5-year-old led the line, followed by a stroller, mommy with one hand on the stroller and one on her oldest son's back.

Score one for the power of a happy kids' song to diffuse the situation.

image © Getty Images