When I started having true, progressive contractions when I was only six months along, I was scared for the first time. I was used to easy, epidural-assisted births -- this one was already too different for my comfort level.
From that time until she finally came, I spent so much time in the hospital and doctor's office that I was on a first name basis with the staff. My sitter was used to watching my other children at odd hours so we could rush to the hospital. On June 3, I spent a disappointing day with my husband. We were expecting to be induced, but my doctor changed his mind and I was stuck at 4 centimeters. I made an appointment for the following Friday and cried the rest of the day.
Fast forward to that Friday. The day before, I finished the last of my finals and was resigned that the contractions would go on forever with no baby in sight. At 6:30 in the morning I woke up feeling tired and cranky. I laid in bed listening to my husband shower. I had a tight pressure in my pelvis, but thought nothing of it because I had been experiencing it for too many weeks to count.
But then my daughter was thirsty and my son hungry so I got out of bed and that's when I realized this was definitely different. I had my husband (who was more scared, worried and excited than me) call my doctor, who advised me to move around a bit and see if that would get things moving. An hour later, we were packing up the kids and heading to the hospital. I remember my son heading into the babysitter's house looking worried and telling me he loved me. For a second I forgot the pain and knew I was truly happy.
When we got to the hospital, I gladly took the wheelchair I was offered and let my husband take over. I just couldn't pretend to have any strength. My doctor said I was a 9.5 centimeters and there was no time for an epidural. He said I would have this baby in 10 minutes if I gave two good pushes. They rushed me into the birthing room and broke my water. Five minutes later, there was bad news. The baby was lodged in my pelvic bone and I needed to move around to get the baby to shift the head.
I was given pain medication and pitocin so that the contractions would increase to help. I cried and screamed and after 40 minutes of pushing in different positions, I really had no more strength and just couldn't do it. My husband just held my hand, stroked my hair and told me he loved me. I know I could not have done the last pushes if he wasn't there, I would have given up and asked for a Cesarean.
Almost two hours later I pushed out a bright red, screaming little girl. What seemed to be almost 8 pounds in my belly had been only 6 pounds, 2 ounces. She looked just like her sister and we named her Anabella Rose. My husband cut the cord and I cuddled my last child before they took me in for a tubal.
Knowing now that I will never have another has been hard on my motherly need to have babies. I'm glad that I had to work at getting my last one into the world. She has completed my family and two months later, it seems that our family was just waiting for her to fill the void. Motherhood has made me a better, more compassionate woman who is fulfilled by all the little things my children do to make my world the complicated, scary, happy, and exciting one that it is.
My Children:
Gabriel Sage born June 27 2001
Elahna Caroline born Feb. 8, 2004
Anabella Rose born June 10, 2005
