Were these words coming out of my mouth? I had never done this before, yet here I was listening to the cues of my body, completely sure of myself. We pushed for about 30 minutes and I was holding my son. The whole ordeal -- that's what people usually call it -- lasted about four hours. It was perfect.
My second pregnancy -- almost 8 years later -- was a lot different. I was at 39 weeks, and because the baby was being estimated at 9 pounds 4 ounces, and because I had a calcified placenta, they wanted to induce me. Great, let's get this over with.
You always hear that the second time is faster than the first. Which meant that I knew Murphy (of Murphy's Law) had something in store for me.
My doctor and I planned a date. "The hospital might call in the morning if they don't have room for you." I went to bed the night before, but didn't sleep. I tossed and turned and finally got up around 5 a.m. and took a shower. We were about to walk out the door two hours later, when the phone began to ring. "We've had a really busy night here. We'll call you when we have the room for you." So I tried to get some sleep. A couple of hours later I was able to drift off. That, of course, is when the phone began to ring. "Come on in."
The ride there was uneventful. No traffic, a beautiful day. We were both silent, and I was wishing for sleep. But also wishing for a baby.
We were put on the "high risk" floor, because they did not yet have room for us on the maternity floor. They soon started me on a pitocin drip. Contractions started but they were mild and fairly far apart. The nurses kept asking if I wanted an epidural, but I really wasn't in any pain, so I kept turning them down. I felt sure that I would know when I would need one, and I just didn't need one so far. Pain medicine? No, thank you. Several hours went by. Every chance they could, the nurses turned up the "pit." I was up to 42cc's (I think that's what they said -- I'm no nurse!) That was completely unheard of. Nurses kept stopping by to see the woman who was not reacting to the pitocin.
Twelve hours later my midwife came in. My pediatrician was out of town, so my midwife got the job. I hadn't eaten in over 24 hours and was hungry. I was "tied" to the bed and had to use a bedpan all day. I was humiliated. I had not had any sleep in a couple of days. I was exhausted.
"Okay, we have two choices here. We can get you something to eat and let you sleep tonight (here's where I burst into tears) or we can get you a new bag of pitocin and keep trying. But you're tired and your hungry, and I think that we should just let you eat and get some sleep. And they should have a room for you soon."
I sent my husband out for chinese. I don't remember what I ate, but it was good. We all had to share forks, because they didn't give us enough, but we made do. Two hours later, we got moved to the maternity floor. It was like a ghost town. I thought for sure that I would be able to sleep. But no such luck. My midwife had left an order for a sleeping pill, but at such a late time I didn't want to take it and be groggy in the morning. So I passed.
